In some cases, the authority and forcefulness could backfire and make the patient retreat even further into his or her shell. Depression, on the other hand, can last for years. After all, aside from the benefits of them expressing themselves, someone just might hear their cry for help and actually try and help them. Offer your support and direct assistance in getting something done for them. The message itself is honest, and it provokes them to reconsider their position, but you are forgetting one important thing.
Get the discouraged person excited about something positive and constructive. Our relationship is deteriorating, I am deteriorating under the almost constant judgement and yelling about how wrong I am, even when I try to correct my actions or speech, even when I try to apologize and assure her I accept the accusations no matter how misguided. He was born on January 15, 1988 and I was born on June 10, 2000. Talk about each option and help your friend figure out what plan is best. If your friend has not yet seen a doctor, encourage him to seek help and reassure him that there is nothing wrong with asking for assistance. This means that you have to be a pro-active friend. Only by acknowledging my emotions could I then decipher my thoughts behind them and find ways to cope with the emotions.
Along the lines of the one above, for some people a hug and a shoulder to cry on can be the best thing. People get so flustered by the best things to say but really all I want is someone to hold my hand and just let me talk. If they go to the cinema to watch a comedy movie, listen to some jokes, or catch some sunshine, this will make their depression magically go away and lighten up their world of darkness. Keep in mind that encouragement should be truthful. I accept that I have not handled everything correctly in her life I was sick for many years , but I have always strived to care and provide for her, have always done everything I could to show my love. Depression, by its very nature, entails negative thought patterns that are highly resistant to change.
There are no magic words that will make someone feel better and it can be tough to know what to say to someone that is suffering. If in doubt, simply offer to listen. I unfortunately have had a series of deaths in my life over the last year — all unexpected a suicide and two deaths where people were diagnosed with terminal illnesses with only a couple of months to live, so they had little time to come to terms with the end of their life. So number 7 is really not facile or a platitude. Those who suffer from it are not able to sleep properly, experience eating disorders, unable to focus and tend to overreact to relatively minor issues. To lure me outside for a walk, for at times I would stay indoors for 10 days straight, my husband used something that was dear to me to attract me.
And I think of the thousands of people who will overcome whatever painful situation I am going through. Sometimes giving them company with a communicable silence is helpful. Get away from the usual and sip cold wine in a gastropub or some-such? However, until the depressed person has given you permission to be their therapist as a friend or professional , the following responses are more likely to help. Focus on what you know to be true: You care about your friend and are pulling for her or him. I start feeling as though my friends are merely pitying me, at best, that they do not really care about me, because why would they like someone as unpleasant as me? Be they a family member, a friend, or the neighbor next door. Everyday things, such as taking a shower or cooking might seem too much to deal with, especially early in the day. It was key that I could embrace my emotions and not feel guilty for feeling them.
More than saying anything, active listening can be helpful to them. Getting me to eat was an achievement, which steered me towards getting stronger. I know how you feel. Be proactive in caring for them. While your mild depression quickly passed, he sees no end in sight for his suffering. She does have borderline personality disorder as well. For example, they would say the same thing if they noticed one of their coworkers painting their fingernails.
Sometimes just being there and waiting with them for the storm to pass can help to. Repeating platitudes like the following can leave him feeling like you are minimizing his suffering and really don't understand that he is already doing the best that he can. When you decide to let them know you will be there for them, regardless of their fears of judgment or of wasting your time, they can feel less alone and feel less social pressure. No other person has that particular combination of talents, insights and personality traits. Either way, a misplaced comment, regardless of intention, can be very damaging to the person who hears it.
For more tips and insight into living with mental health visit. Plus, it's not about other people: It's about what your friend is going through. Depression is unreasonable, commonly occuring without a good reason Ultimately, emotions such as sadness and grief are a normal, everyday, part of life. Focusing on a brighter future helps a person get past a gloomy present. I am not going to leave you. What am I supposed to do? The temptation for anyone not suffering from a mental health problem was to discount him or her and tell me they were not there. Remember, depression is an illness — it can affect people of all backgrounds.
Until then your efforts to help them might as well be wasted. To let someone know that you understand that this is an illness that needs to be treated is important. Hearing positive reinforcement can help soften their self-berating tendencies and test the reality of their thoughts. To be reminded that we are not worthless, that we are loved, can help a lot. Making sure they feel comfortable asking for and receiving help can ease the pressure of daily life considerably.
Depression has a way of being an all-consuming, monster of a battle. Should I try to make her laugh and get her mind off her situation? Depression, on the other hand, is a highly unhealthy condition that can easily destroy a person from the inside. One of the features of my illness is that I start to feel completely unlovable, the worst person in the world, deserving of nothing but hatred. These are simple ways to actually make a difference, lighten the load, and maybe even get a smile or at least stop the tears for a while. I think some extra support might offer a fresh perspective and maybe a little relief. However, those feelings of isolation provide one of the biggest opportunities for loved ones to help, explains Gregory Dalack, M.